FanPost

Please console me; I got rejected by Bleacher Report.

I thought that that it would be prestigious to say that I had made the cut and written for Bleacher Report (BR), a forum that would broadcast my talent in Clipper analysis to the entire world. I could put that on my resume and look professional, hopefully helping me get a job when I graduated, despite the fact that BR continually publishes content that is of lower quality than any other news source.

In fact, I thought that that would play into my favor when I applied. So I wrote what I felt was a beautiful article on the five changes that the Clipper organization should make in order to contend for a championship. I even catered to the Bleacher Report style, keeping my arguments as simple as possible and listing them point-by-point. The cherry on the top was the set of carefully chosen pictures that I included for each frame, as suggested in the application procedure.


But unfortunately, my efforts were met with a swift rejection:

In your particular case, the writing sample you submitted for review failed to satisfy the requirements to which we hold all applicants.

The reasons that I can think of for my rejection are:

  1. I lacked professional experience (I'm still an undergraduate)
  2. My sample was too long (about 550 words without captions; suggested 250-500)
  3. My style was too ornate
  4. My article was not newsy enough
  5. My analysis was passionate or technical
  6. Despite my efforts, my story was not sensationalistic.

In any case, this ends my prospective career at BR!

I thought it would be only fitting to seek consolation at a place where the forum is held in such low esteem.

Has anyone else a similar experience or funny story about BR?

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