clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

If Each Clipper were a Neighborhood in Los Angeles

New, comments

The first of our new Clips Nation writers has the first of his front page features today -- Longtime citizen Schmidtty McFunStuff asks "How do your favorite Clippers players compare to notable neighborhoods around the city?"

Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

In order to tie the team better to the city, I thought it would be fun to match each Clippers player with a neighborhood in Los Angeles. Now obviously, with only 14 players on the roster, I can't get to every neighborhood, so some will represent greater areas in general. Also, because of the limited number of players I stuck with only places in LA - apologies to citizens in Orange County.

Blake Griffin- Silver Lake

As much as it pains me to say this, Blake is a hipster. His Kia spots alone land him a permanent spot with the Intelligentsia crowd. Beyond that, he ends up making long-time fans hipsters by proxy because we so often feel the need to point out that we liked the Clippers, "before it was cool." Add in his love for thick-rimmed glasses with no lenses and a bit-too-tight short-shorts and the result is clear.

Chris Paul - Beverly Hills

Debonair and suave, CP3 is the ideal match for the panache of Rodeo Drive. The man wore brooches on the bench while he was injured last year. Both Paul and Beverly Hills are the cream of their respected crops, but both come with their drawbacks. Beverly Hills comes with higher taxes and pretentious dinner parties, while Paul comes with the occasional playoff meltdown.

DeAndre Jordan - Downtown

Once thought a lost cause, Downtown Los Angeles has been renovated and renewed into something very promising. While great now, it still has jaw-dropping potential. Does that not mirror DJ's story perfectly? Add into that the incredible nightlife downtown and our beloved center's penchant for partying and you have a match made in La-La Land.

J.J. Redick - Hollywood

Come on now, with devastatingly good looks like his was there ever a doubt he would land Tinsel Town? The fact that Dennis Rodman starred in a movie but JJ has yet to grace the silver screen is a truly a tragedy.

Jamal Crawford - Venice Beach

How could someone nicknamed JCrossover not end up repping LA's most legendary street courts. I mean seriously, how great would he look out there balling with Billy Hoyle?

Matt Barnes - Compton

Gets a bad rap as scary and dangerous but still plays an integral part in the overall chemistry. At times you might get upset at the things that happen but overall you appreciate their soul and are glad they are part of the team.

Spencer Hawes - Los Feliz

A bit quirky from an aesthetic standpoint but has some aspects that you really love.

Glen Big Baby Davis - West Hollywood

I mean really, how could you not put this guy in party central? He is the guy you need when you want to turn it up.

Hedo Turkoglu - Koreatown

Old and often overlooked, they still have a lovable charm and provide, perhaps unexpected, but welcome services. While you might not appreciate them while they are there, you miss them when they are gone.

Ekpe Udoh - Pasadena

Ekpe is an avid reader. So much so that he hosts #EkpesBookClub on Twitter. So what better place for him than the home of the world's largest public library?

Jordan Farmar - Griffith Park

It's the closest thing we have to The Shire.

Chris Douglas-Roberts - The Valley

Every team needs a journeyman like every city needs a suburb. If CDR is considered a "glue guy" then the relative idea can be applied to the valley. It isn't flashy or sexy but it plays an important role in the cohesion of the whole.

Reggie Bullock - Calabasas

Both Bullock and Calabasas are usually an after thought. Sometimes you completely forget they exist until they are put right in front of you. Yet, when you do some digging, you find that they share a passion for charity. Bullock volunteers heavily in programs aimed at helping youth - especially when it comes to slowing street violence. Calabasas, according to an article by the LA Daily News, is the most philanthropic zip code in LA- where middle class residents donate 14% of their discretionary income to charity.

Joe Ingles - Santa Clarita

So for this one, I am thinking of the greater Santa Clarita/Saugus/Agua Dulce area because that is going to be the closest thing LA has to the Australian Outback. It's either there or the LA Zoo, simply because he might be more comfortable surrounded by terrifying and deadly wildlife just like he would be down under.

C.J. Wilcox - Boyle Heights

So this one was a bit tricky. I must admit, I know very little about Wilcox outside of the fact that I enjoyed whenever his Huskies lost to my beloved Alma Mater, Cal (Go Bears!!). After spending time combing through his Twitter, his obsession with "The Office" is blatantly clear. Because of this, he will represent Boyle Heights - a neighborhood home to a surprising number of paper manufacturing companies.

So there you have it, each Clippers player as represented by a neighborhood in Los Angeles. How do you feel about the results? Share your thoughts below!!